So, I tried to talk to dh again last night about the catalogue. I explained that the interest rates are high (39%) and that I thought that we agreed that we hated the company? He likes the fact that he can pay his items up when he doesn't have the cash. I'm tired so I'm trying to think of the phrase, but it's one of those things: if he didn't order from the catalogue he would probably have the cash. A paradox?
He told me that he has over seventy pounds worth of rewards to use! Why didn't he use them to get himself a game? Well, a while ago, we were talking about getting the kids something from the catalogue with the rewards. I ordered J's birthday present using my rewards (so it was essentially free) and I was happy so I never mentioned it to him again. He told me that I could pick what I wanted to get him with his rewards.
It's dh's birthday in a few months. I brought up the subject last night too. I asked him what he wanted. He still wants to go to York. What's your back-up? A game. I told him to pick a game he would like if we can't get to York.
As for the catalogue, he said he would still want to order so he can keep his reward status (10% back on his minimum payment, excluding BNPL) I don't know how I'm going to change his way of thinking. Hey, dh, set up a blog on SA and see what everyone thinks of your debt? No?
I asked him to give me a list of his minimum payments, debt and interest rates so I can put the details on What's the Cost. He didn't seem that enthusiastic about it, but said he would do it. I guess I could find the details myself since he gets paper statements but I'd like him to do it himself.
The only thing that has changed about dh's attitude is that we're still in agreement that we're going to buy a new hoover (vacuum cleaner) next pay, I'm pretty sure our one is going to stop working soon. Although, dh also said he would have a look at it. I found one in Tesco and Asda that was about 40 GBP, that was their cheapest. It's probably not a good idea to get the basic one but I think it might be the start of a good habit: paying for things with CASH when they stop working/need replaced.
I forgot to add that dh noticed my BOS statement last week. He read the interest charge, and noticed one month was higher than the other. He wasn't happy, you should phone and get this sorted. If only the catalogue listed how much interest was being charged on each statement, but they don't.
Follow Up
June 4th, 2015 at 06:44 am
June 4th, 2015 at 07:31 am 1433403102
I have read your blog for over 2 years.
I appreciate your comment and love your updates as well.
This long update is best. keep doing them.
I hope you can get your partner on board. you work so hard and too see your money go up in interest is unfair. I know your job is harder because you cant control (not trying to sound bad) all the household spending, its hard when your trying to work with another person.
you should put him on a cash only diet!!!
Know I am hoping you get everything into a low interest loan and can enjoy your money more!!
June 4th, 2015 at 07:46 am 1433403993
June 4th, 2015 at 09:25 am 1433409923
The example will take a little while but it would be worth it. Good luck
June 4th, 2015 at 09:32 am 1433410360
June 4th, 2015 at 11:34 am 1433417670
June 4th, 2015 at 01:02 pm 1433422976
Anytime you buy when you don't have cash it is always going to cost you more. (Exception 0% interest). You have to have the strength to squash the inner child that is demanding their wants right now, especially when there is an emergency. Your debt is the emergency. There is a fire burning right outside your bedroom, but it's being ignored. Buying something else is like lighting another match and throwing it out the window on the other side of your home.
If the game was 10, but on BNPL it is 15. Would he have bought it today with cash for 15? Or does that seem overpriced? If so, why would you buy it like that? The BNPL is the worst possible way to make purchases. That extra 5 his is committing to spend on BNPL for the item (in my example) is money that could have gone to pay on your debt.
I know you are learning together, so my comments aren't meant to be hurtful...only helpful to your future discussions. Cheering for your Sarah!
June 4th, 2015 at 01:15 pm 1433423716
June 4th, 2015 at 01:19 pm 1433423974
June 4th, 2015 at 01:36 pm 1433424985
June 4th, 2015 at 01:39 pm 1433425184
He's falling for the "delay the pain" tactics the catalogues rely on. I know I felt deprived when my c/cards were at maximum, and every pay meant first paying to get under limit, then fees, and then interest and so I would buy something as a treat to feel better - but I was falling for their psychological trap. I wish you so much luck Sarah in dealing with this, as I think once he gets it and gets motivated by the falling balances you'll be unstoppable and your family's financial freedom becomes possible.
June 4th, 2015 at 02:04 pm 1433426689
CB I love the way you've explained it I'm going to try and use that line "you're only getting 10% back on something you're paying 39% interest for"
June 4th, 2015 at 02:07 pm 1433426826
June 4th, 2015 at 05:00 pm 1433437205
Most money decisions are trade-offs, right? Seems like the games might be quick gratification--like when lots of eat chocolate, drink, shop, etc when we know we shouldn't. Delayed gratification is a hard thing to learn, but a big sign of maturity and self discipline.
I hate to pry, but were his/are his parents spenders? Money habits often come from our families. I know my DH's do. And mine too.
June 5th, 2015 at 12:20 am 1433463659
June 5th, 2015 at 06:53 am 1433487208